Welcome! I’ve placed distilled thoughts first, story time next and then after that I have a few artistic suggestions for yall’s week! Enjoy! -M

Thoughts Distilled.

• You are in a constant state of growth and adaptation, if you are pursuing it. Understandably, you might wonder if you could be growing faster, but with provided circumstance you may only be able to walk. So walk. Step by step within these environments. But each step, each break, you are growing. Continue moving forward.

• Healing through story. As I wrote this, as I usually do, ideas sparked, and I felt a sense of security in my decision. Through this finding, I can recommend exploring the things you might not want to. The ugly hard things. Build story around them, let them scare you.

  • Recently I created a little horror sketch, it was supposed to be more comedic, a parody on scream, but there was one part in particular I accidentally made kind of scary. It made me wonder if the people editing horror movies also get a bit scared of their own work. I imagine that they’re used to it after having faced their fears multiple times. Immersion Therapy???

• Be conscious of the people who are closest to you, sometimes we deal with more than is necessary when it comes to those we love. Realizing what you need takes time and a constant analysis of the self, eventually, though, you will begin understanding what’s most important for you. Please respect that. Respect your needs.

• You can love from a distance. It also may be the only way. And that’s ok.

Story Time!

When I was living in NYC I found out a lot about myself. I found out my problems that resided within myself, and I went to work on healing those things. It was a deep exploration into the self, the conscious, and I felt I came out somewhat healed, but an understanding that I had a lot of work to do. The hardest realization was that the work will forever continue. though I healed quite deeply, I still wasn’t doing great in NYC. I was struggling to make new friends, I was finding difficulty in the area in which I lived, and there were memories there that were making it harder to attend to my inner self. Not only that but I was making a major shift in what I was doing. I no longer wanted to sing showtunes on broadway, I wanted to work more closely in discovering humanity in the work I did. Meaning movies, TV and plays. I also missed nature, and NYC does get pretty grey sometimes, they’re not kidding when they call it a concrete jungle. I felt a necessity to explore opportunity elsewhere, so I acted and made the decision to leave. So with a location set, I moved back to Ohio to save money living in my parents home, before I’d would inevitably leave for the ultimate location.

There’s been many decisions to leave within my life, in different aspects. This was one I, at times, regretted. Mind you, I’m not a regretful person. I sense the silver linings anywhere I go, and the fact is yes, I have found the silver linings here in Ohio. There’s been growth within me, physically and mentally. But in spiritually, I do find there to be a sense of regression. I’ve been crawling back into my inner child, and childhood traumas (lower case t). I’ve been living with my parents, so of course there’s going to be some memories that come up within that space. Here I’ve been dealing within this space of old

I never intended on staying here very long. In fact I’ve been steadily planning my escape. But sometimes you cannot plan your way towards anything. A constant reminder at how little you can really control. A few things came to a head quite quickly, and now I need to leave. It’s still, in fact, my decision to leave, which came from many years of going through the same thing, over and over again, trying new things but getting the same results. For respect to my parents, I wouldn’t like to go into what occurred, maybe someday soon I’ll feel comfortable enough to go into detail. But in general, I decided I deserve better, whether that means I have to spend time in a car sleeping in parking lots, that’s fine, or I have to go into debt to live in a space that makes me feel safe. That’s fine too. So here’s my decision. My decision to leave.

With all of this happening around me, I still feel calm and somewhat centered, thrown a little off that center of course. This is because I’ve been able to continue my work. I’ve been able to continue my creativity, and I’ve still been able to laugh regularly, maybe with a little weight, but it’s only natural, or feels that way. I think my reactions to present circumstances are proof that maybe I’m not regressing like I think I am. I really am constantly and consistently growing, and the tools and tactics I learned through therapy, through my own self study, through health and wellness, through productivity, through psychology, through childhood traumas, through Ekhart Tolle, through Dr. Nicole LaPera, through ALL my learning, I am always in continuation of this learning. The skills I have now will in fact continue growing, and I believe that’s why I’m not too afraid to leave, more confident in my decision. Because I’ve learned what works for me and what doesn’t, what I need to heal. Also, I’ve learned when I am in a physiological state of fight or flight.

I won’t be able to afford NYC or CALI yet, there’s a few cheap places I can live within the Columbus area in Ohio, so I intend on heading that direction as a midway point while I continue pursuing my artistic and spiritual path towards freedom.

Another Journey to come!

A Few Artistic Suggestions

Movies

• Anything Wong Kar-Wai - Genuinely this artist is someone I’ve begun to follow ever since I started with Chungking Express. A Hong Kong Film Director, Producer, and screenwriter, producing an incredibly vivid style of cinematography through wonderfully saturated colors, incredible music (My favorite: Yumeji’s Theme ) and introduced to me a cool technique I might implement which he uses choppy slo motion for heightened action. All that takes is a higher shutter speed on my camera, so maybe you’ll see that in my next vid ;)

• Decision to Leave - The title inspiration of this weeks article. Directed by Park Chan-wook, a South Korean Film Director. Film Noir (My fave) and don’t want to go too deep into it as most of the findings come from emotions that are pulled while watching it.

TV

• I don’t watch a lot and I haven’t watched long form TV in about an entire year, but kickin’ my time back into the TV world is The Last of Us. This show captures human fear in a brilliant apocalyptic and post apocalyptic world. Most definitely a different type of apocalypse, the main questions and themes brought up are what is one willing to do to survive? The question of good and evil. If you want a good moral and ethical tickle, this one’s for you. I don’t want to just leave it at that either. Either good, or either bad, wherever these characters land for you, you find empathy, and I think that’s the job of both the creative team and most importantly the actors. Pedro Pascal Ya’ll. However, both Nick Offerman, and Murray Bartlett make an episode appearance, and offer a performance that will in fact leave you in shambles. This, I can assure you.

Podcast

• Only one this week and it’s a masterclass. The Rich Roll Podcast brought to you by Rich Roll, has masterclasses that compile conversations done from the podcast revolving around pertinent topics and stuff alllll of that value into one beautiful compilation of wonderful information. My recent favorite is the meditation masterclass. I’ve been feeling my work through spirituality has been stagnating recently, if not regressing a bit. This particular episode brought insight, and understanding that I needed to continue forward in my work.

YOUTUBE

• Van Neistat - Love this guy, Poetic, and an incredible storyteller. Big inspiration from him. Worked with Tom Sachs: Contemporary American Artist who was responsible for the popular “Space Program” exhibition

Music

Instrumental

• Yumeji’s Theme - Shigeru Umebayashi

• La Parfum de Fleurs - Taku Matsushiba

• 13 Pieces for Piano, Op. 76: II. Etude - Performed by - Göran SöllscherJian Wang. Written by Jean Sibelius

JAZZ

• Early Summer - Ryo Fukui

• Windows - Chick Corea

Higher tempo

On My Shit (Freestyle) Performed by Snow Tha Product Written by Claudia Feliciano

Lemon - Kenshi Yonezu

Kick Back - Kenshi Yonezu - Theme song to Chainsaw Man (I plan on watching this soon)

Invite

If you haven’t already join our discord! As time goes we’ll hold weekly meetings to discuss all things art and our craft! Come hang!

A Mark of Safety.

My Friends! Before I end this I want to let you know, quite clearly, that I really do not intend to sleep in my car, so don’t you worry about me. Yes, some things will get difficult, or maybe they will get easier, there’s no certainty that I can give you. I do have some people who have offered a spare room or a place to stay, so I am safe in this regard, I intend to try and not take them up on it if I can help it. Newsletters and YouTube WILL continue! Wasn’t expecting so much to happen all at once, but I plan on continuing the work I set out to do! I believe I’ve built a steady enough foundation, a canvas to continue creating for you all. I’m hoping to continue my exploration, and bringing you along with me!

Much love today and everyday!

Matt Piper